Open my head and this is what you'll find

I dont like to yell I hate it. You never listen to what I say so fuck it and you. Cold hearted bitch, your friends are laughing at you because they know what you had. Foolishness and jealousy plague your heart and mind like a cancer. The ancestors rolled their eye’s when they saw you doing that shit. So beautiful but so dumb. So alive but so numb. Could’ve been like God’s among insects but your choices fucked that up. Until today I’ve never seen you as a bitch, but you’re no good. Rotten as the apple Eve gave Adam. I wonder if it bothers you that I will never be back. At this point acknowledging that I never existed would be best. I bled for you and prayed for you but you chose negative. I’m so multi-faceted that your one dimensional eye’s can’t see me full. So fucking busy focusing on what I don’t do, you forgot what I can do. I never even thought of putting my hands on you when I saw that shit, I was devastated. I wanted to believe it was someone else, but it was you. Going through all my shit, all the lies, the forgotten trust. You fucked it up because fear gripped you. I can’t hear shit you say to me… I’m an individual, always have been always will be. I’ve grown tired of this vicious cycle, it comes so often the only pain I feel is the headache afterwards. No more, I’ve had enough.

She left a stain on my heart, I can’t lie. I may be forgotten by many but I will be a legend in the heart of someone who deserves it. There are times at night when I wish she could or would hold me. She used to take her kisses when she wanted them but lately it seems as if she was not interested. She’s got my heart on a string and she knows it. She may do it bad but I let her. It hurts sometime but everybody ain’t for everybody. You may want to drive a Ferrari now but that don’t mean you can afford the note. Love was spilled all over the place when we got together at first. Now there isn’t a drop left and i’m so thirsty… It can make you sick at first cause of how gone she can be. Sometimes im like fuck love, then again at times it’s all I have to give. She makes you wanna be good all the way around, just so you can be bad with her. When she’s gone it’s the worst and she don’t give a damn. Lost here and no one cares, why because you aren’t the first to be left alone… chase all you want but she will burn and leave yo ass. Women are elusive creatures, and we treat them as if they are here to stay. A woman will get fed up with your bullshit and leave eventually… God damn devil in a new dress…

Hi Alice,

   I hope i’m not disturbing you, I just stopped by to tell you some things. Well, i’ll start by saying this; Your’e an incredibly gorgeous girl with a mind that many shall never know. If this were back in roman empire, you wouldv’e been a muse. I know you prefer to be lost but, there are those who find you from time to time. Your nature leads me to believe that you are someone to hold on to. But you aren’t one to be held tightly. I equate this to holding a butterfly in your hands; If you hold to tight you could crush it. If you held it gently and let it fly away, then maybe it’d come back to you. Your presence is felt from a distance and being with you, makes time fly by. This is to allow you to not disturb your delicate balance of things.

I told Alice that I loved her and she couldn’t see how or why. She cannot be approached as you would another. Her emotions clothe her like fine silk. Her Poise and grace are worthy of the best mojo. She is not a soul sucker but a lifter. You will fall for her be it infactuation or love. You will fall. She dose not mean to hurt because where she is from love is not an emotion. This is not clear enough to explain, but what about this creature is. She could walk into a room and her beauty makes you instantly misjudge her. You judging bastards have not enough character to speak to her. Her mind constantly wonders and you could be talking to her; She won’t be listening. A weaker person would take this personally. Her scent eludes you and you begin to look for her when you smell it breifly in the air. She is gone and you probably will see her maybe once more. I know you want to be found eventually but sometimes even the most notable friend must leave you for a time. It’s not a curse, I see it as protection. Protection from those that prey on the Alice’s all over the world. Remember Alice, i’m a friend and i’ll be here to do just that.

Been a while since i’ve been here. Feels funny to be here, The worst of it is over and I think they can see it. The end of an epic masquerade. The ultimate Valediction… Some of us have been here before and you can see the fall from grace coming like a storm sweeping across the field. Wind blows away the dirty ways you’ve heaped upon each other. No quater will be shown and you’re at the mercy of the creator. Healing will come because he promised it; but it won’t be swift. The fights, the arguing and the most incommon disregaurds from both sides. Lines were drawn and crossed simultaneously. In the end afterwards there is nothing left, you just walk away and never look back. Don’t look back because you’ll do it again and die. Being saved from yourself is such a task to undergo. There are forces that you can’t see; the love is like a black scarf over your eyes. The years before were fleeting and the valediction seems to last forever. By then you’ve become almost numb to the feeling. It fades in and out and the world seems to look down on you because you seem to be wrong. But wrong is living something that you know to be a lie. Love dosen’t lie but would you lie for love. I refuse to. What’s lost is lost and I will be found soon…

• Name: Ryan J. Cortez bka Groove tha funky drummer
  
• Age: 26
• Where You’re From: Houston by way of St. Louis, MO
  
• Sexuality: Incredible Heterosexual
  
• Single/Taken: Left my heart in Japan (Shibuya District if youre interested.
  
• Favourite Colour: Black
  
• Favourite Type Of Music: Whatever Mayer Hawthorne puts out!
  
• Favourite Band: Dave Matthews Band
  
• Why You Follow me: Cause I want to and I like looking at your hair
  
• One Thing You Want To Tell Me: Lets go swimming
  
• One Thing You Want To Do Before You Die: Go live in Europe for a month
  
• Something Random: BOOBIES!!!!
  

It’s cold out and cold in too…

Im in amsterdam and having a fucking good ass time!!!!!!!

I really miss smoking with the most beautiful girl I know. We really had a lot of fun together, it was good for the bones. Then time has a way of running away from you, when you try to spend it with someone you like. It’s still great though. I have no regrets and i’d do it again any day my friend. Peace